Sometimes I get nervous when people ask me if I believe in God
And then I think how endlessly human beings fall in love with the world
And with each other, over and over
And how my Lola always told me that you don’t have to like someone, but you do have to love them
When I said with all the hate I could store in my tiny 8-year old frame
That I hated the school bullies who pushed my friend Ilan into the dirt on the playground
And whether or not it’s God
Or the Universe
Or whatever Powers That Be
I know I have music running through my soul
Carrying the tune of every place I’ve come to call home
Echoes of melodies that have run through my veins for centuries across dynasties
From ancestral explorers following their own call into the unknown, like I’ve followed mine
This year’s symphony has been accompanied by harsh snow and crashing waves
Motes of sunlight and a firm breeze beating down on my back
Skin still healing from the new art I’ll get to wear forever
Enshrined upon my shoulder blades by another artist
Who saw my soul and my vision
And breathed new life into the sharp set of my shoulders
And gentled it with tears and starlight
Now, it’s a quiet shift before a new verse
But I anticipate the Brazilian funk, and forro, and samba music that’s travelled back with me
Nestled in the folds of my shoelaces
To eventually settle in my soul
And become another bit of the orchestra that I can choreograph a piece to
A dance no one will ever be able to replicate in its entirety
I’ve moved beyond the melancholy stanzas that echo bittersweet memories from childhood
Into a melody sweet with anticipation
Of a blessed life
A far cry from the shadows
So I think if I do believe in something
It’s that there’s always something bigger
And whether or not it’s God
Or the Universe
Or whatever Powers That Be
I’m humming new tunes laced with spiritual electricity